It looks like you already got some great advice, and the short answer is "yes."
Now, do you NEED a long-arm for Overlanding? No, no you don't. But at the lift you're at the short arms do start to run into funky geometry especially as the suspension cycles. You'll get a better on-road ride (which, IMHO, is crucial for Overlanding, we put a lot of street miles in) AND you'll get better articulation and performance offroad.
As for brands, lucky for you the XJ gets LOTS of love with the aftermarket. It's pretty hard to go wrong with stuff from Clayton or Iron Rock Offroad, and Rubicon Express always was one of the best, but I think they got bought-up and aren't on the same level as say Clayton anymore. The key is to work with your supplier to spec out the right kit for YOU.
Assuming you do a lot of pavement driving, make sure the arms and such you pick have bushings on one end, not spherical bearings/heim joints/johnny joints at both ends or the NVH transmitted will get annoying. If you don't NEED to go 16"s or 17"s (big brakes) then stay 15". You'll have way more sidewall on a 32-33" on a 15" or MAX 16" and it'll both ride better, and perform better offroad. I have a ~31.7" on my WJ right now on a 16" and it has a reasonable sidewall. I went with Goodyear Duratracs because they have a great reputation and were available in the size I needed for a 16" rim in a C load range (as pointed out above, you don't want something like an E that's made for a much heavier truck).
Goodyear LT265/75R16 Tire, Duratrac - 312018027 These work great on my WJ Overland that's certainly heavier than your XJ.
I think 4.10s will be perfect for you with a 32-33" tire with it being a daily driver. Another thing to keep in mind if you do get a bit more serious offroad than most Overlanders are the axles on your XJ. You have a Dana 30 in the front, but it could be a Dana 35 or Chrysler 8.25" in the back. The 35 is glass. The 30 has a bad rep... but for Overland-type use it's a decent option. My WJ has a D30 in the front, and it's much heavier with more HP/TQ than your XJ. If you treat it right, it'll survive. However, if you do go to a 33" I would look into sleeves, gussets and a truss for the D30. In the back, if you have a D35 I wouldn't spend a dime on it, I'd go junkyard "shopping" for a 8.25", or if you're mechanically inclined and have the time look for the Ford Explorer 8.8" that is way stronger, nearly bolt-in, and will give you discs in the back.
-TJ